Tapped Out?

Image via Wikipedia Commons

I’ve been working on a short story. It’s supposed to be slightly horror – that is, it should unsettle the reader, though won’t likely scare anyone. A horrific thing happens and you can see the lead up to it, but because of the viewpoint, the reader never gets all the information and when the story concludes, they’re likely to have more questions than answers.

I’ve never written one like this before, and that was the point of it. I wanted to stretch myself, challenge myself as a writer, and so I came up with a few ideas that I thought might help me do that.

Problem is, I haven’t been working on it.

This may mean nothing – I haven’t been working on anything lately. I have a painting on my easel, just waiting for me to get back to it, a watercolour planned, a diorama kit of an abandoned gas station I’d like to get to, and some felt soft sculptures that need finishing. Instead, I’ve been thinking about other people’s writing, trying to make some room in my tiny cottage by going through three boxes of long unplayed LPs, gardening, and working on my family’s history.

This isn’t unusual for me. My creative output is always low because I’m easily distracted by all of the other things that interest me – volcanoes, history, political science, mind science, and everything I’ve never heard of before. Lately, I’ve had a near-obsession with Ancestry.com and working my way up and down the family tree in every direction. This is complicated by the fact that I’m also working on my late husband’s family tree at the same time.

But getting back to the story.

So distraction is part of the problem, but I try to at least write 200 words a day. Very little, considering I have done upwards of 3-4K a day, when I’m on writing fire. Which I’m not with my writing lately. In the olden days, and with most of the very short fiction I post here, the writing sort of took off and I was just along for the ride. Hasn’t been like that with my longer works – I struggle to feel my way through as though I’m blindfolded rather than the helter-skelter gallop I have been used to and got high off of.

That’s obviously another part of the problem.

Distraction I can – and have – dealt with. But it’s not a problem, when I’m fully invested in the work. Yep, there’s the real issue – I’m not fully invested in the work. And I don’t know why. Other stories I’ve told were just as complicated and I had no difficulty starting or continuing. If anything, I had difficulty turning off the flow at any point.

The only thing that comes to mind is that maybe I’m overthinking. Trying to infuse what I write with as much literary goodness as possible might have sucked all the fun out of the process and caused the tap to close. And while the desire to open the tap is there, the handle seems to have been mislaid.

How I can fix this, I’m not sure. But I know that, in the meantime, I have to work on finding the discipline I need to continue putting the words down, even if they’re only 200 at a time. If I let myself off the hook for one day, getting back to it the next day is harder and the temptation to skip another day is easier.

One day, I hope I can find the handle for that tap and see my words flowing freely again. Until then, I’ll have to savor each drop I get.

The Rook – A Book Review

The Rook (The Checquy Files, #1)The Rook by Daniel O’Malley

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Imagine that you are a high-ranking member of a super-secret, quasi-governmental, paranormal agency in the UK with a long, long past. Now imagine that one of other top members is trying to kill you, but you have no idea who. Lastly, imagine that you’ve just come to your senses with bodies all about you and no memory of how you got there. Or who you are. The only help available to you are some letters your previous self wrote to you before her memories were destroyed and those, along with her meticulous preparation for this moment, are all that can keep you alive. Well, that and your ability to kill people with a touch. If you can get yourself to use it.

The Rook is the title of both the book and the main character. Myfanwy (to rhyme with Tiffany) Thomas is one of two Rooks in the secret organization she works for, called Chequy. The other one is a super-soldier called Gestalt who shares one mind between four bodies. She has lived most of her life among people like Gestalt, people who can spit bugs, make metal into different shapes by thinking about it, gorgeous vampires hatched from eggs and a boss who can walk through your dreams whenever she wants to.

Among these talented and often assertive paranormals, Myfanwy is a lesser-valued asset. Though she has a scary power, she’s reluctant to use it. Most things and people upset her and she prefers to work behind a desk, which is actually good for the organization, since Myfanwy is a super bureaucrat. And fortunately for her, both her ability with touch and her administrative acumen remain when all of her memories are destroyed. She will need them and more to discover her enemies and preserve Checquy. In the meantime, she will also have to cope with the usual business of migrating forests, psychic ducks, and learning to run a military operation while worrying about others noticing she isn’t the same old Myfanwy.

This is Daniel O’Malley’s debut novel and it’s a better than average start. He blends frightening ideas like people with heavily-modified innards with comedic elements like the psychic duck without hurting the pace or pushing you out of the story. This is likely because the narrative is conversational throughout, especially when reading the letters Myfanwy I writes to Myfanwy II. Through the narrative and letters, we get to know and like both Myfanwys. By the end of the book, I was really sorry that Myfanwy I couldn’t avoid her transmutation into Myfanwy II and developed a big appreciation for her talents as an organizer. Without them, Myfanwy II would never have made it.

There are mysteries within mysteries in The Rook, some of them connected to those inimical to Checquy and some just crazy things that have to be dealt with. The world in which they happen has a very real feel with history, grudges, silly traditions, and enemies. Though O’Malley has done some fantastic world-building here, Myfanwy’s story is ultimately about how others see us and how we see ourselves and what we might do if we had the chance to remake ourselves without the baggage of our memories.

All of the characters were well-drawn; enough so that I felt the loss when some of them didn’t survive. But there was never any confusion on who the story was about. There were also no dead-spots; everything included in the story was there for a reason, including those small breaks where something funny happened that pointed up just how absurd such a life could be even while it gave you a breather from the action.

If you like to lose yourself in a well thought-out world with layers of interesting things to think about in the plot and you like a touch of humor with your dark fantasy, then The Rook may be for you.

NOTE: There is a sequel Stiletto which has just been released, but The Rook pretty much stands alone.

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